My Happiness is Private?

Sometimes, I feel like I have less of an urge to blog when I’m really happy. Writing is an outlet for my rumination when I feel like I do not have anyone to talk about things. When I’m happy, I tend to be absorbed in my own activities like reading, spending time with family or generally engaging in productive work. Am I happier when I’m busy? Recently, I feel like everything looks bright and cheery once again and I feel hopeful about the future. Maybe it’s because I feel very close to my family right now and the feeling of social belonging keeps me mentally satiated.

I’ve been spending a lot of time recently reading and playing jigsaw puzzles of all things. I’m trying to do more of what I enjoy most when I was young. Surprisingly, I can still read chinese novels after a long hiatus of having nothing to do with anything chinese. I recently read two novels, inspired by the hong kong movies i watched: one is a wuxia story called 鹿鼎记 and the other was 蓝血人. I’m sure I mentally skipped plenty of words I didn’t remember but at least I didn’t feel any difficulty reding through the whole thing and understanding the plot etc.

Recently, we, as in me and Johnny, tried to speak to each other in Chinese, something we’ve actually never ever did before. It was all in the grand plan to get Calvin to pick up more chinese or at least acquire the correct accent… But it felt kinda awkward and we easily fell back to English again. On the other hand, I can see that it might be very helpful because Calvin was starting to parrot what we say.


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