Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

10 year Old’s Image of the Future

November 16, 2019

C: When I grow up and move to my own place, I would need to earn money for myself.

Mom: (teasing) What? You are not going to earn money for mum and dad?

C: Yeah, but I need money to buy my equipment (presumably for his 3d printing/ toy making/ robotics?) Oh and maybe you’ll give me some money also.

Mom:  Hmm, like an allowance?

C: Like maybe $5 for parting money.

Mom: $5 isn’t enough for even a meal for you then (>_<);


Thinking of Buying a Home

October 28, 2019

Had to do quite a bit of thinking about little man’s choice for secondary schools and what might be a good fit for him. Finally decided on a place that’s a compromise of all the different things we considered – school, proximity to close friends and to a lesser extent, commute to work. Of course that’s all within the constraints of price. This is probably the one time I kinda wish we had more money so we won’t have to worry about it.

So after sitting on it for two years, we might finally be ready to buy something if it looks right.

Standing up For…. Justice?

October 28, 2019

Little guy came home with the story of how he got a classmate, A, to apologize to someone else for messing up their game. So A apparently hates chess and decided to knock down all the pieces some other classmates had set up on the school giant chessboard. He even went as far as teaching him how to apologize properly by getting the other person’s attention first before saying sorry. I’m quite impressed, perhaps my words to him do sink in after a while.

Phone Anxiety

September 20, 2019

Hurrah for exposure treatment. I still dread the calling so much (quickening pulse, cold hands etc) and I felt pretty tense even though it was just a call to make a doctor’s appointment. As scripted as it can get. The call itself went fine so I’m not sure why it bothers me. I think what some people said about not doing it often is true. I noticed I didn’t have any problems with calls to family, but I rarely talk to strangers. I think I’m just worried that I’d sound foolish if I suddenly don’t know what to say or don’t say the right words. It’s irrational, I know but I guess that’s how phobias are. I’m just proud that I managed to do it without too much procrastination this time. It did take some mental prep and even went as far as writing down what I needed to ask, just in case my mind blanks out.

I know for sure that uncertainty is one big trigger for me. Like if I had to drive to a new place I’ve never seen before. That makes me all jittery too.


September 13, 2019

Yesteday, me and little guy went for our first kendo lessons. It was hard! I think the wooden sword they gave us was too heavy for him. On the other hand, swinging this thing around is definitely going to build some badly needed muscles for both of us. When I got home, I was so sore I thought I wouldn’t be able to lift my arms today but surprising, all I got was a gentle ache. Hurrah for a good workout!

All I can think of now are the kendo manga I’ve read before and how the high school kids would practice that basic swing daily and they would say have 1000 swings a day or something like that. I don’t think I even did a hundred in that 1.5 hour session.

Little guy was marvelling at how cool the kendo uniform, especially the helmet it. I’m not sure this is a sport suitable for my skinny guy but it sounded like fun so we gave it a go. I’m not sure if we are a little overcommited this fall – karate for 2x a week, kendo 1x a week + instrumental music in school. He wants to do the violin and they are expected to practice 30mins five times a week (Not going to happen….I’d be pleased if we could do 3x) I’m guessing I’ll have to scale back our daily homework to mainly reading in chinese for a while.


July 10, 2019

I never saw joyfulness as a special or noteworthy characteristic of mine until I started seeing it in little C. I appreciate how happy he is in general, until something bad or unexpected happens. Even then he can usually muster up some positivity after he has calmed down.

It would have been much harder if I had a more intense kid or one with a dour disposition. I’m not sure that J can withstand a whit of whining.

J likes to say I’m a worse pessimist than him(and I obviously think he is wrong) because I tend to think about all the things that could go wrong, and prep myself to prevent it from happening or at least be mentally prepared for it. I think that’s just my anxiety about things going wrong and knowing how I hate that flustered feeling of not knowing what to do in the moment. I call it being well prepared.

Handy Mum

June 28, 2019

I fixed his Nerf gun that stopped working after it was dropped. Got rid of the squeak in his door. Clear out the gunk in a blocked bathtub drain. Also learned to change the bike tires and disassembled the sink stopper to clear a clog.

I definitely like working with my hands. Too bad I do not have a daughter so I can show her that girls need not be the damsel in distress waiting to be rescued. Well, at least my little guy would have a different opinion of girls perhaps?

I suddenly remembered his friend coming over and saw me and J playing Terraria and decided I looked less powerful even though we were basically doing the same thing. I just had that feeling I was being stereotyped. Hopefully my son will not be have that same bias about women/ girls.

Last day of the school year

June 27, 2019

It feels like this year passed quickly. In two more years, he’ll begin secondary school, which kinda terrifies me.

This summer, we are going to explore more of his interests. Hoping to go deeper into robotics and electrical circuits. He wants to climb trees and practice shooting a bow. I’m hoping to do a bit more cooking with him.

We have been painting together this past week. I think we’ll need to practice either holding off on beginning till we hear all the instructions or just go free exploration first and then talk about the techniques. I have a feeling the second would be more appealing but in reality, school would be more like the first.

Skinned Knee

June 24, 2019

I had my first skinned knee from biking and a first in many many years. We’ve been biking around the empty parking lot nearby and I was trying to make sharper turns, after being inspired by a video I saw on biking skills. Obviously my balance needs to improve first before I should attempt that. It was still fun to ride a bike though the skinned knee is a big annoyance for a week.

Validating My Choices

June 18, 2019

I recently thought about how my staying at home has positively affected my little C. He’s a wiggly guy, who’s very creative but doesn’t do well with verbal instructions. He wouldn’t do well in a structured environment for most of the day, from school, to after care, and then to Summer camp and enrichment classes. I think he might still be happy, but he’ll also be stressed from not having enough down time.

He wouldn’t have started to enjoy math and may not begin to think of himself as competent in it.

I wouldn’t be able to curate all the wonderful books I’ve introduced him to. I cringe to think he’d be stuck reading Dork Diaries and Captain Underpants.

To make sure he learns some Chinese, we’d have to sacrifice Saturdays for Chinese lessons.

He may not be able to have as many playdates with his best friend and cultivate that deep friendship. And I, too, wouldn’t be able to cultivate such a deep friendship with him, which would be a shame and which I’m hoping would weather is through the potentially tumultuous teenage years.

In the end, this was exactly what I knew I wanted when I was young. I knew that if I had a child, I would like to have time to teach him/ her and pass on my values. Now, more than ever, I truly believe I’ve made the right choice for us. It may be different for other – some kids thrive with structured activities and meeting multitudes of people. I’m glad that I was able to make this choice and keep my little free spirited goblin unfettered for a little longer.